Home What's Brewing? Seattle24x7’s Fall “Rumor” Preview: Psst! Keep This Under Your Hat!

Seattle24x7’s Fall “Rumor” Preview: Psst! Keep This Under Your Hat!

It has been a glorious Seattle summer joyfully overheated with bold discoveries as well as simmering disclosures from all corners of the Techtopolis.

From Microsoft’s Surface tablet to the Mars Curiousity Rover guided by a NASA Flight Director from the UW named Boback, from soaring temps and stock valuations to low-down, dubious sell-offs, from tabloid journalism rapping Steve Ballmer and coronating new Yahoo CEO Marissa Mayer, to a mountainous legal verdict for Apple vs. Samsung, to Seattle’s perennial Casual Gaming Conference, Search Marketing Expo Advanced, and a dozen other major conferences making Seattle summers the “Computing Port-of-Call.”

Spinning the blades of the Northwest geothermal “rumor mill” this week, Seattle24x7 harvests the almost ripe, early bumper crop of speculative rumors, entertains far-fetched, fast-pitched notions, and sacrifices all logic at the altar of Mayan philosophers before the fated 12/21/2012.  Herein, we pick up on and pick apart the most curious, colorful and controversial rumors for the Fall season just ahead. Note, all soothsays may not align and any objects in your mirror will be larger than they appear in this column. Please, no wagering!

Apple will announce an iPhone 5 on September 12 but NOT a new iPad Mini which will be announced a week or two later, (after the initial thunder cloud has clapped.)

Apple, and/or its dedicated legions, will reposition any iPad Mini tablet as the world’s “largest Smartphone” — even larger, and smarter, than the Samsung 5.3″  Infuse™ 4G.   Now you can “dial softly” over VOIP or 4G and carry a “big” phone.

–  The nay-sayer’s retort is that Apple will shock the world by stubbornly ruling out a 7″ tablet, damn the “fits in one pocket-&-one-hand” matter of convenience. Tim Cook will cite Steve Jobs’ visionary comment about “bigger ideas needing a bigger canvas.”

Amazon will beat Apple to the punch on both tablet sizes, announcing a new Kindle Fire 2 in both 7″ and 10″ models as early as September 6th. How do we know? We don’t!

– The rumored Amazon Smartphone, (no it is NOT named the “Kin,” that name was taken), will be so smart that its camera lens and microprocessor will transform any retail establishment’s product, book, menu or bar item captured in your viewfinder into an instant A/B shopping comparison spotlighting the instant savings you will enjoy when you press the “shoot” button and, instead of a photo, order the same from Amazon.

— The Nintendo Wii-U will roll-out on Sept 13, inaugurating the Miiverse, a new social network that provides Nintendo gamers with the ability to communicate with one-another. The online Miiverse service will launch on the Wii-U and then spread across Nintendo’s other platforms, including the 3DS handheld system. No Twitter or Facebook partnering here. The Nintendo Gamer Hall of Fame deserves it own Miiverse.

– The Apple-Samsung verdict will be a boon for Microsoft as developers, stakeholders and end-users find a confident moment of clarity in the stability of the cross-licensing deals Microsoft has struck with Apple, not to mention the Windows Phone, non-infringing interface, unlike those Android copycats.

 – Conversely, the Apple-Samsung verdict will backfire for Microsoft as phone makers who currently pay MS a licensing fee decide to negotiate a more preemptive and encompassing royalty arrangement with Apple.

Mark Zuckerberg will apologize to Facebook users, not only for “Sponsored Stories” where Facebook is negotiating a larger settlement amount demanded by the judge presiding over the lost class-action lawsuit, but apologize for profiting from the personal data Facebook collects from its users without “licensing” said data from “us” or compensating “us” financially in any way, shape or form. Facebook will become a non-profit “credit union” and begin sharing the wealth with every end-user whether or not he or she voids all personal privacy options and “shares their social graph” with “shareholders.”

Google will finally ‘fess up and admit it actually abhors SEO and its mischievous practitioners. After all, SEO is the one activity that attempts to “manipulate” the algorithm and thwart Google’s attempts to homogenize the user experience.  The “Love/Hate” relationship Google has feigned with SEOs will be revealed as a ruse.  Retreating from its “Do No Evil” position, all SEOs will be summarily arrested and incarcerated in MountainView pending a “Reconsideration Request.” [24×7]


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